RECORDING: Some Class #5

Words can build walls or bridges. At Busways, right now, everyone's building walls.

But what if changing just a few key phrases could transform the entire dynamic?

Here's something fascinating: Researchers studying conflict resolution found that the first three minutes of a conversation predict its success with 96% accuracy. Those first few sentences either open minds or close them.

Let's look at the language that kills dialogue versus the language that creates breakthrough:

Wall-Building Words:
"You need to understand..."
"The fact is..."
"That's not fair..."
"You always..."
"You never..."

Bridge-Building Phrases:
"I'm curious about..."
"Help me understand..."
"What matters most to you is..."
"I may be wrong about this..."
"What if we..."

But here's where it gets interesting. The most powerful phrases combine curiosity with contrast:

For Management:
Instead of: "We can't afford to raise everyone's benefits."
Try: "I'm curious - what would make you feel valued beyond just compensation?"

For Veteran Drivers:
Instead of: "We earned these benefits!"
Try: "I want to understand how we can protect what we've earned while creating opportunities for others."

For New Drivers:
Instead of: "Equal pay for equal work!"
Try: "Help me understand the challenges of making changes to the current system."

For the Union:
Instead of: "We'll take industrial action!"
Try: "What would need to happen for everyone to feel this is a win?"

But here's the crucial part - these aren't just nice ways of saying things. They're strategic tools that:

1. Create psychological safety
2. Demonstrate respect
3. Show willingness to listen
4. Open space for new possibilities

Think of it like martial arts. The goal isn't to meet force with force, but to redirect energy toward a solution.

The most powerful question in a standoff isn't "Who's right?"
It's "What could we create together?"

In our next piece, we'll explore specific meeting structures that use these language patterns to create breakthrough moments.

But first, try this: Take the last thing you said in this dispute. How could you rephrase it using bridge-building language?